Biblical Leadership:
Elders and Deacons at Mercy Hill(Part 2)
We are in week two of a three-week series on elders and deacons. So why do a three-week series on elders and deacons. Here’s the four reasons I shared last week:
First, because it’s been a long time since we’ve taught on how Jesus wants His church structured. It’s crucial that all of us understand from the Bible how Jesus has structured his church, and how we are pursuing that here.
Second, because we need to add more elders. We have two elders right now, and optimal for a church of our size would be four of five. So I am praying that Jesus will use this series to stir some of you men to consider eldership and to take steps to grow into that responsibility.
Third, because we need to raise up deacons. We have never had official deacons. But Jerry and I have become convinced that this is important. And we believe it would be helpful to teach on what deacons are so we can recognize those who are already functioning as deacons, and raise up more.
Fourth, because we have learned some new things about eldership. Over the past months Jerry and I have been studying this topic. And we’ve learned some new things about who elders should be, and about how to raise up and train elders. So I want to share these new thoughts with you.
Like I said last week, at Mercy Hill we are passionate about raising up Christ-treasuring men and women and children. We are passionate about establishing Christ-treasuring families full of Jesus’ love and shining His love into their neighborhoods. We are passionate about seeing Christ-treasuring Home Groups established throughout the South Bay – where we worship Christ together, love each other and bear each other’s burdens, and advance the Gospel together. And as God blesses we long to plant Christ-treasuring churches in Almaden, Los Gatos, Cupertino, North Valley, and Santa Teresa.
But to do this we need more leaders and workers. And in the New Testament, leaders and workers are called elders and deacons. So that’s why we are doing a series on elders and deacons.
So quick review: who are elders? Elders are men who work together to organize the church, lead the church, teach the church, and love the church. And deacons are women and men who help the elders by taking on official positions of service in the church.
This morning I want to finish explaining about elders, and then next week we’ll take a look at deacons. So let’s talk some more about elder qualifications. Turn to Titus 1, which is on page 998 in the Bibles we are passing out.
The New Testament gives two different lists of elder qualifications. Last week we covered the list given in 1 Timothy, this week we’ll look at the list given in Titus.
5 This is why I left you in Crete, so that you might put what remained into order, and appoint elders in every town as I directed you—
6 if anyone is above reproach, the husband of one wife, and his children are believers and not open to the charge of debauchery or insubordination.
7 For an overseer [a different word for an elder], as God's steward, must be above reproach. He must not be arrogant or quick-tempered or a drunkard or violent or greedy for gain,
8 but hospitable, a lover of good, self-controlled, upright, holy, and disciplined.
9 He must hold firm to the trustworthy word as taught, so that he may be able to give instruction in sound doctrine and also to rebuke those who contradict it.
Now notice that in v.6 Paul mentions elders being the husband of one wife – which means that a husband is passionately faithful to loving and caring for his wife. But when Paul says “husband of one wife,” is he saying an elder must be married, or just that if he’s married he must be husband of one wife? The wording could go either way. So which is it?
What swayed me was hearing John Piper ask – would Paul have been disqualified from being an elder? Would Jesus have been disqualified? That’s impossible.
So since the wording could go either way, and the New Testament holds singleness in great honor, it makes most sense to us to conclude that single men can serve as elders.
Notice also in v.6 that “his children are believers.” Does that mean having unbelieving children would disqualify you from being an elder? It sounds like it at first. This is something we’ve needed to pray over and study carefully.
First of all, the word translated “believers” is the Greek word “faithful” which could mean “believers,” but which also could just mean “obedient” without any reference to saving faith. In other words, the Greek word is ambiguous. Paul could be saying that an elders children must be believers, or he could just be saying that they need to be obedient to their parents. So which is it?
I’ve been persuaded by guys like George Knight, John Piper, and Mark Driscoll that an elders’ children do not need to be believers. The reason they say that is because of what Paul wrote in 1 Timothy 3:4-5 (page 992). This is the other list of elder-qualifications, and look at what he says about elders’ children in vv.4-5 --
4 He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive,
5 for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God's church?
Notice that Paul says nothing about an elder’s children being believers. He just says that an elder’s children must be submissive and well-managed.
So in Timothy’s church an elder’s children did not need to be believers, but they did need to be obedient and well-managed. And since this passage is clear, it makes sense to let this clear passage weigh in on the ambiguity in Titus 1. So I take Titus 1 as saying the same thing Paul says in 1 Timothy 3 – that an elders’ children do not need to be believers, but that while they are under his roof, they should be submissive and well-managed.
Here’s a quote from Alexander Strauch:
The contrast is not between believing and unbelieving children, but between obedient, respectful children and lawless, uncontrolled children … Since I Timothy 3:4 is the clearer passage, it should be allowed to help interpret the ambiguity of Titus 1:6 …
Those who interpret this qualification to mean that an elder must have believing Christian children place an impossible burden upon a father. Even the best Christian fathers cannot guarantee that their children will believe. Salvation is a supernatural act of God. (Alexander Strauch, Biblical Eldership, p.229).
So if you are single, or if you have children who are obedient but not believers, you can be an elder.
So how will we raise up elders here at Mercy Hill? What should you do if you are interested in exploring whether you are called to be an elder?
The first step would be to move towards being a home group leader. Elders are called to shepherd the flock. Here at Mercy Hill the main shepherding takes place in home groups. So in this church it’s probably important for each elder to either be leading a home group, or be overseeing home groups he has raised up.
Then as your home group involvement shows that you have gifts of leadership and shepherding, and as you feel God is calling you to pursue eldership, the second step would be to fill out the elder application, which will soon be on our web site.
Then the elders will go over your application, and assuming that you appear qualified, you will be assessed by a team of elders and wives. This will last two hours, and would involve you and, if applicable, your wife, and we’d ask lots of questions to learn about you and to help you discern if Jesus is calling you to be an elder.
There would be three possible outcomes from this assessment. One would be that we do not feel Jesus is calling you to be an elder. Another would be that we think Jesus might be calling you to be an elder, but that there are some conditions that need to be fulfilled to confirm that. A third would be that we believe Jesus is clearly calling you to be an elder.
In that case there would be a fourth step, where you would be presented to the Mercy Hill Church community for feedback – not for a vote, but for feedback to help the elders decide. We would follow up on the feedback, and if there’s no red flags, then on a Sunday morning we’d officially install you as an elder. So that’s how we will raise up elders here.
I think it’s also important to talk about what Jesus calls the church to do towards the elders. To see this, turn to Hebrews 13:17 (page 1010). Last week we covered what Jesus calls the elders to do towards the church. Elders need to live exemplary lives, love and shepherd and protect the flock, teach the Bible to the church, lead and set policy for the church, train and equip leaders in the church.
So this week let’s talk about what Jesus calls the church to do towards the elders. Look at Hebrews 13:17 --
Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account.
This is sobering. Jesus loves His church. He purchased her, paying for her sins with His own blood, changing her heart by the power of His Spirit, giving her faith and repentance, and loving her, strengthening her, protecting her. Jesus loves His church.
And He gives His church to elders, and says: “I love this church. I bought her with my blood. So keep watch over her, because one day I will ask you to give an account.” So one day Jesus will ask each of the Mercy Hill elders to give an account of how he cared for you. So pray for us.
But notice what Jesus calls the church to do towards the elders: He says obey your leaders, and submit to them. It feels awkward to call you to obey and submit to us, but if I am going to be a good elder I have to teach you what the Bible says; that’s what it says.
So what does that mean? It means that unless we are calling you to believe or do something unbiblical, you should follow our lead. Not because we deserve it; we don’t. But because Jesus deserves the love and the unity and the mission that will result from this obedience and submission.
But you could easily think this means you can never raise any questions or that you can never disagree with the elders. That’s not the case. You will have times when you disagree, and God can use that disagreement to show us blind spots. So we want a culture where disagreement is welcomed, not stifled.
But there’s two very different ways to disagree. There’s a way that brings unity and harmony, but there’s also a way that brings division and dissension.
Think about it like this. If you have a problem with an elder or anyone in the body of Christ, who should you talk to about it? The person with whom you have the problem.
To see that, let’s look at Matthew 18:15 (page 823). Here Jesus talks about a time when someone has sinned against you; but the principle applies to any time you have a question or issue or disagreement with someone. Look at what he says –
"If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.
So if I’ve got a problem with someone, the only person I should talk to about that problem is that person. I should not talk to anyone else about it.
But what do most of us do? We don’t talk to the person we’ve got the problem with. Instead, we talk to others about it. But what happens when we talk to others about it? Look at Proverbs 17:9 (page 540) –
Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.
Love covers a multitude of sins. So if I love you, and I have an issue with you, I will not talk to others about it. Because it I talk to others about it, then I separate them from you. I divide them from you. I’ve harmed the body of Christ. And Jesus doesn’t like it when we harm His body.
So what should I do instead? I should go to you, and humbly share with you my concern, so we can work it out.
So here at Mercy Hill Church we want a culture where people can disagree, not in a way that brings division and dissension, but in a way that brings unity and harmony. So if you have a concern with the elders or anyone, bring it directly to them.
But what should you do if someone starts talking to you about their problem with someone else? I would firmly but lovingly say they need to take their concern directly to the other person, and that you will go with them if that’s helpful, but that it’s not appropriate for them to talk with you about it.
Let’s say at lunch today someone says: “I can’t believe pastor Steve is taking three weeks on elders and deacons!” There’s two problems. One is that this person might have something helpful that I need to hear, but I’m not hearing it. The other is that this person has a problem, but nothing is being done to resolve the problem. All that’s being stirred up is division and dissension.
So what should you say? You don’t need to stick up for me. That’s not the point. The point is that this person should be talking to me. So urge them to come talk to me, offer to go with them, but say that it’s not appropriate for you two to talk about that without Pastor Steve hearing.
Now church, this is not going to be easy. Our culture teaches us to complain about other people all the time. But we are called to be a counter-cultural community, where people who don’t know Jesus are drawn to Jesus by our love for each other. Imagine being part of a Christian community in which no one ever gossips or slanders or speaks against anyone – where every grievance is humbly taken directly to that person. That would stun anyone who saw it – and it would greatly glorify Jesus.
Now let me close with a word to the men. Men, we need more elders. Not all of you are called to be elders. But as we all earnestly and passionately trust and follow Jesus, God will raise up more of us to be elders.
So – men – wake up to Jesus’ call. Get on your knees, open your Bible, and seek Him until your heart is filled with His glory and His love. And then with that filling, turn from porn and greed and timidity and laziness.
If there’s tension between you and your wife, humbly sit down and talk with her about it. Gather your wife and children and share Jesus with them and pray over them.
Work hard at your job, knowing that it’s Jesus who’s your boss. Bring your finances in line with God’s Word. Do all you can to be part of a home group, and go deep with that community of brothers and sisters.
Ask Jesus how you can advance the Gospel in your workplace and neighborhood, and boldly take the steps He calls you to take. And do all of this in heart-reliance on Jesus, trusting Him to satisfy you, and trusting His righteousness alone to justify you.